The Miss E Of Worlds Most Hated (E's for Eerie, not Elated)

No spoilers about the new book so you can read this if you haven't read it yet. And OMG, PLEASE read it because I can't actually deal with being the only person I know who finished it. I'll post a journal to discuss it later but I can't deal with that right now.

"You look like you've been up all night, freebasing Harry Potter." - Eric.

It's true. I look like shit. I've been bawling my eyes out for hours. I haven't slept yet. I'm distraught and delirious and I've taken to clutching my wand or my book and bursting into tears every 20 minutes or so. I snivled to a stop before we went to go see Suspiria in the Hollywood Forever Cemetary but I think its because I'm so bone tired from not having slept in 48 hours and running my emotions ragged reading that I just can't cry anymore. I'm sure I'll freak out again tomorrow.

But let me go back, to 6pm yesterday and a lifetime ago. I stood in the bright, warm sunlight a top the parking structure beside Barnes and Noble, happily waiting to get my wristband in the balmy air. Steve, from tha B-net, caved to my relentless pestering and consented to accompany me on my nerdly journey of giggling anticipation. We nipped a quick bite to eat before ducking in to Barnes and Noble to do all the activities.

I made a choice to come do the big events with the crowd because I'd had so much fun the last book release. I was literally chosen out of all the people who were "sorted" to be the "champion" for Gryffindork (in all my Slytherin stuff, mind you) and won the trivia tournament and a broom and tons of other nonsense. Steve will back me up when I say that, as we were waiting in line, the woman who organized the whole event caught sight of me and said "hey! You're the Slytherin that won last time!"

I am, in fact, Queen Nerd of Nerd Town.

I played in a few trivia challenges but it wasn't as good of a shindig as last time. We went to line up at 10 and I spent the intervening time regailing Steve with stories about high school Ninja attacks and the life and times of Harry Potter. He was a trooper and stayed with me until 1am when, clutching my book in joy, I raced home to begin it.

However, the lovely gentlemen from 2*Sweet were spending the night and my desire to hole up in my room and read was thwarted by their desires to be all around rad dudes and just hang out. We chatted until about 2:30 at which point some of us retired to watch the Harry Potter movies while everyone else slept. While it was awesome to be so revered for my utter nerddom and to have company in Harry Potter love, it slowed my reading immensely. The last book, I finished in 5 hours. This one took about 7. I drifted off to sleep for about 15 minutes but I dragged myself upright and kept on reading. Matt had passed out on my floor but woke up and relocated to the living room, offering me full ability to totally flip out alone and undisturbed.

And I did. I punched the book so hard and so frequently that I have a giant bruise across my knuckles and it hurts to close my fist (or type so feel loved). I thwaped it soundly with my wand like it might rearrange the words. I screamed. I cried. I yelled "NO NO NO NO NO!" into my pillows so as not to wake my slumbering household. And when I got to the end, I put it down and bawled my fucking eyes out. When everyone came in to check on me at 10am, I was pretty much a mess.

But even with an additional 2 hours on my normal reading time, plus a late start, plus the time difference to the east coast and Europe, none of my friends had finished it. So I was left to agonize on my own.

Jeffree, in his eternal awesomeness, treated me to Pinkberry with the 2*Sweet guys before they left for SF. He returned me to the apartment and bade me to sleep but I was too overwrought to just pass out. And with my best friend's birthday weekend upon me, I had no time to sleep. Instead, I wiped off all the traces of my tears and headed over to my two biffles. I tried not to bawl too hard and instead curled up on the couch to watch mobster movies before heading to the cemetary.

I am so exhausted that I haven't even processed this is the last book. It haven't even processed the deaths of the characters yet, not really. But the last book? There will be no more book releases, with Marauders Maps of Barnes and Noble and little kids adorably dressed like Harry, Harry, and Harry. No new tales to await, no feverish debates over what will happpen next, no arguing for my dearly beloved Prince, who I will always stand by. I honestly feel like I've lost a friend. These books have been a huge part of my life for years. Its awful. Its truly, truly awful.

The book was grand and I loved it. I'm happy to have it and have everything be complete. But I can honestly say that it is so depressing just to know that the series is finally done. As totally nerdy and lame as it is, they are books that mean a lot to me and that I love. When I wake up tomorrow and truly process that its over, I'm going to be bawling all over again. I'm sure some of you feel the same so lets have a moment of silence for the end of a truly beautiful thing. Today was the end of an era.

In Memoriam,
   Miss E (Death Eater, Slytherin, and Proud Nerd-to-the-Hilt)

Wow.

Just.

Wow.

So, I've done a lot of cool things this past week. I got to see Kat Von D's new shop, High Voltage, which is stunning. I got to attend a lovely little soiree at Tarina Tarintino's shop on Melrose. I've done some fun things this week, like seeing A Skylit Drive at the Whiskey and the Spazmatics at the Dragonfly (where Jeffree and I giggled in some glee at seeing Chance from 'I love New York' waiting at valet). I did some lazy things this week. I redesigned my myspace and several other people's. I cheered for my friend Lacey on the premier of the Rock of Love. I even got to see the new Die Hard, which OOOOOOWNED. I got some work done, be it conference calls to labels or to consumer affairs (don't ask). And I even got to do one thing that was important to me, which was go to the premier of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix with Steve from Buzznizzle. (It rocked, btw. Much better than the last two.)

Now that I've gotten the interesting stuff that I'm supposed to tell you about so I seem cool and connected and therefore able to soapbox with impunity out of the way, let me tell you about the one thing that I did this week that you ALL should do - go see Sicko by Michael Moore. Like all of his movies, it is compelling in the simplicity of its question - why doesn't America care for its populace like the rest of the Western World? We are the ONLY nation that doesn't provide universal health care to its citizens. EL SALVADOR has better health care than us. I'm not kidding. Guantanamo Bay has free health care. Let's all go there. I'm sure I can get us all arrested. Mooning the White House is indecent exposure + treason, right? Hey, if it'll get me that surgery on my jaw I need, I'm down. I'll pull a full moon in the Rose Garden.

But please, please, please, PLEASE don't JUST see the movie - do something about the issues it raises! Bitching that Americans have atrocious health care and we should all move to France is all well and good but that isn't going to solve our national health care crisis. I'm going to provide a few links to really, really simple stuff you can do like signing petitions and writing your congressmen. But it is ultimately up to you to fight for change. If you are of age, EDUCATE YOURSELF AND VOTE! I cannot stress enough that voting is our most crucial right and our primary way of changing the system. If you are not of age, educate yourself anyway and go work for a campaign. You don't have to be 18 to try and help the candidate you feel would do the best job get into office. Or, if you are passionate about an issue, research charities, voter's groups, lobbies, etc that campaign for that issue and find out how you can contribute. I can't tell you all the resources but they are LEGION and a little Googling goes a long way. If you are not an American citizen, I encourage you to research candidates and issues in your country and do your best to help out. Taking ten minutes a week to sign some petitions and do some action alerts sent by the charities of your choice is a very, very simple way to begin to make a difference. I cannot stress enough that it is our own inaction and laziness that allows corruption to spread unchecked. No matter what your age, your country of origin, your economic status, your gender, your race, your sexuality, no matter what - we are all human and every single one of us can make a difference. No one person can change the world, not Hitler nor Ghandi. It is people working together - for good or evil - that change the world. Please, please, please educate yourselves and take time to begin to make a difference.

Here are just a few links that I found through some quick Googling of health care issues. This literally took me five minutes, that's how easy it is to find resources for change. Again, Google is your friend. If you have a cause you believe in, type it into Google and hit search. The resources you will find will amaze you. But don't just take my word on this or any other issue. GET EDUCATED AND MAKE YOUR OWN DECISIONS! If you disagree with me on this or any other issue, DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT! Don't just write blogs on Buzznet calling me a bitch. That doesn't do anything. Make something of yourself, show real support for the things you believe in, build a career, and show me up. Then, with the government on your side and that high paying job you can really send those hit men after me you keep threatening me with. I don't know how many ways I can say this - DO SOMETHING IMPORTANT. Don't do it for me. Do it for you, for the people you love, and for the country you live in. I don't care if you love me, if you hate me, or if you're indifferent. There are important issues in the world and we all need to do our part. Hopefully, we can all agree on that.

http://www.michaelmoore.com/sicko/what-can-i-do/petitions/pnum649.php  Urge the government to extend Medicare coverage.

http://www.michaelmoore.com/sicko/what-can-i-do/petitions/pnum651.php Help me (and the rest of California) get decent Healthcare

http://www.amsa.org/uhc/uhcaction.cfm Ideas on how to spread the word and show support for American Universal Health Care

http://www.capwiz.com/ams/home/ A website that provides health care-related action initiatives by zip code.

http://www.uhcan.org/joomla/ Information and action alerts on US Health Care

http://www.aflcio.org/issues/healthcare/ Health Care information from American Union Workers

http://www.familiesusa.org/ FamiliesUSA's info on Health Care across the nation

Please be aware that I include spoilers about the contents of this documentary. However, I do not reveal very much and it is all information YOU NEED TO KNOW!

Transformers, a new documentary film by director Michael Bay, offers a compelling and hard hitting look into the robot menace our government is trying to keep from us. Michael is best known for his earlier documentary works; The Rock (about prison jailbreaks) and Bad Boys 1 and 2 (about police brutality and ineptitude). His new piece of work eclipses even those bold pictures.

Several thousand years ago, several pieces of alien technology from the planet Cybertron crash-landed in the Artic circle. These items were uncovered by an exploratory team during the Hoover administration and then covered up by our very government. The Hoover dam was built to keep these items a secret – from other governments and especially from the very aliens that created this technology. However, the aliens have discovered the whereabouts of their items and Michael Bay has discovered the existence of this whole conspiracy! In his film (in theaters now), he offers a direct look at these creatures and the shadowy government group, Sector Seven, that is charged with hiding them from the public.

According to the film, these robots can copy the forms of human machines and thus may be hiding in plain sight. The film’s motto – More Than Meets The Eye – is a chilling reminder that the very laptop I am writing this on may be plotting to overthrow, enslave, or even decimate the human race. Examine your machines carefully. If they begin acting strange – playing apropos songs during pivotal moments, relocating around your house with no apparent help, destroying other robots in their vicinity, or terminating your pooch for peeing on them – react accordingly. Identifying early signs of the robot uprising could save you and your loved ones.

Transformers follows several key characters through the film. Through the eyes of Captain Lennox, we see the deadly military ability that these creatures wield. The US government allowed Michael Bay’s cameras inside US Airforce bases in Qatar and, a first in cinema history, deep inside the strategy center of the Pentagon. There, audiences encounter Maggie Madsen, an Australian and recent graduate who has been drafted by the US government to help with a series of hackings into our government’s top secret computer network. This is where the film truly gets scary. The firepower these machines wield is nothing compared to their abilities when it comes to manipulating other computer systems. Like its sister documentary, Independence Day, this movie clearly shows that aliens have all installed Windows AND Macintosh operating systems on their spaceships and are clearly working out how to install those pesky shell scripts and configure their systems for Linux as well. (Good to know that even robot aliens can’t easily configure Linux!) In a chilling sequence, all of Earth’s communications were taken offline by the alien menace. I, myself, experienced this phenomenon going to Buzznet one afternoon. I saw the black screen with the white text – Buzznet will be back shortly – and knew the alien invasion had begun!

But nothing was more disturbing then the horrible tale of Sam Witwicky. He was deceived by these robots and tricked into buying his first “car”. Instead of owning what he hoped would be a rolling lair to de-virginize local school girls, he instead found himself in the clutches of the robot menace! But when Sam, an upstanding American citizen of strong moral character alerted authorities to his (and our) crisis, was there a swift response to defend our nation? No! Instead, authorities bungled and mishandled the information, causing them to make a series of misguided arrests including Sam himself, as well as his family and even their dog. The government raided the Witwicky home, causing thousands of dollars in damages, then proceeded to break every rule of proper conduct by taking the Witwickys to a secret base without trial or attorney counsel! Is the right to habeas corpus nonexistent?

The government operatives in question, the mysterious ‘Sector Seven’, operate above the law and independent of the Justice Department. There are no checks on their power and the very existence of this branch of government is an affront to the very values this country was founded upon! We function on a system of checks and balances. No governmental body is above the law – yet Sector Seven has the authority to kidnap and torture innocent civilians in the name of our great country!

But even the humanitarian outrages of our government that are brought to light in this documentary do not touch the sheer horror audiences feel upon seeing the alien technology in use. Michael Bay’s cameras have the fortune to capture several battles between the US military and the alien forces. Though we seem to have found ways to destroy the robots, their defenses are strong and a true show of force by these robots may well overwhelm our military. We are already stretched thin with our engagement in the Middle East. Are we truly prepared to face the mounting Cybertronian threat?

I encouraged everyone to see this chilling documentary. We must all educate ourselves and insist that our government take this information seriously. Programs must be created to educate the public about how to cope with invasion by alien forces. Critical procedures like hotwiring your computer monitor to a short wave radio and using the contraption to broadcast morse code through the 4 foot thick walls of the Hoover Dam on a secure government channel to authorize airstrikes as necessary MUST be taught in American schools! Also, every American should be equipped with EMPs (electromagnetic pulse weapons which neutralize all electronics within its area of effect) which, for some illogical reason, the US military didn’t think of using and instead emptied countless rounds of bullets to little effect into each robot. Though the website affiliated with the film offers little in ways of dealing with the robot menace, I would urge each of you to see the film then write to your Congressmen as well as the President, Vice President, Secretary of Defense, and any media persons you think may broadcast about the contents of this film. Truly, Transformers may prove to be the most important documentary of our time and director Michael Bay should be applauded for his brave, brave picture!

Hopefully, in this upcoming week, I will have the opportunity to see the new comedy by Michael Moore entitled Sicko about a fictional country in which no one had proper health care and large corporations were allowed by the government to profit of the suffering of its populace. Its sure to be a laugh riot!

Why do we do this to ourselves every summer?

I found myself asking this question to Angie GoGo and Sarah Dope (and everyone in a three car radius who could hear me yelling) as we pulled into the parking lot for the Pomona Warped Tour date. Angie and I had been out the night before at the pre-party so I had already seen Bad Religion play a longer set in a more intimate setting than I would at the behemoth outdoor festival. Why the HELL was I willing to brave the crowds, the heat, the dust, the inevitable hassle with the list, the fights, the sun… I can go on and believe me I did… to see them again?

I have my days where I can be a downer and Pomona was fast panning out to be one of them. Of course there was a hassle with the list but after a phone call, Angie and I had jolly purple passes that meant we could go just about anywhere. Where we went was straight for the shade of Bleed the Dream’s merch tent and the company of our friends. I fell into a beach chair and refused to be budged. Why am I doing this? I thought, stoically refusing to have any sort of fun at all. I refused to crack a smile at Keith’s silly antics. I scowled greatly at the hugs from Dave. I furrowed my brow at Angela’s suggestion that we walk around and see who else was there. I pouted mightily at the plethora of good friends we ran into and scorned all the loving hugs I received.

I was hot. I was thirsty. I was cranky. I was too old for this shit. I was NOT going to have any fun.

I moped my way through the morning sets, trailing after Sarah Dope, who was taking photos for Alternative Press. I had to put on an extra burst of moping around 2 because I’d actually gotten giddy and skipped around tent city, excitedly gathering stickers (oh weird) and chatting with all the people on the tour – new friends and old. Warped Tour is like a giant family and I’d be DAMNED if I wasn’t going to be the surly teenager of that family.

I will not have fun today, I told myself. It’s hot and I’m cranky and the lemonade slushies are super tasty… DAMNIT! I need to be more negative. THIS SLUSHIE IS NOT SLUSHIE ENOUGH! (Yes, I did actually say that.)

I had a giggle fit that I had to deny when I found out that Street Drum Corps would be playing at 4:20 at the Skullcandy tent, every single day, all tour. I always make a point to go see the SDC guys as frequently as possible but this time, damnit, I was not going to enjoy the spectacle of Adam slamming a beer keg with a lead pipe, Frankie beating the cymbals and screaming like a Maori tribesman gone berserk, or Bobby playing the Theremin in the midst of all the chaos. I certainly did not enjoy shaking my booty to the tunes with all my friends and if anyone said any different, I’d say they were a liar.

The hottest part of the day was over so I switched my whining from “its too damn hot” to “I’m so damn hungry.” To my dismay, we got food quickly and it tasted good. There was even an abundance of napkins and condiments and the food was less that $10. Man, was I pissed. Sarah Dope bought me another lemonade slushie for us to share before she disappeared off to shoot Killswitch Engage. I had a glorious bit of storming around and complaining that we couldn’t find her before my phone beeped and there was a text telling us where to meet her. I tried a new tactic of complaining that my feet hurt but I was once again foiled as we went to go sit in the Takeover Records tent. With shade, water, a chair, a full belly, and friends, I was out of things to whine about so I got up to go wander and see other friends… and whine to them. Everyone was having such a damn good time that I couldn’t get anyone to commiserate with me. Angie and Sarah caught me singing loudly to Bad Religion (because I couldn’t hear them over the crowd, I shouted over Greg’s amplified vocals) and dancing around with Jamie and JP. I hurriedly suggested that we go backstage, lamenting that my phone was going to die.

We hopped up on the Takeover RV, where I was given an outlet to charge my phone and a bottle of water for my thirst. I spent the next several hours running around the bus lot, riding Mark’s bike, chatting with my friends, eating, playing video games, meeting new friends, and generally NOT HAVING ANY FUN AT ALL!

It took us until midnight to finally say goodbye to everyone and leave. I took my friend Emily, who is working at Music Saves Lives this year, home with me for hangs. We were up early to go to the Ventura date, which had me complaining. Since it was so early, I got to park backstage and not pay for parking, skip all the traffic that made everyone else four hours late, hang out with everyone I’d met the night before while they were setting up, help out with the various booths, get a filling breakfast, watch my friends in Phathom play, get coated in sunscreen by my new husband, and relax in the shade of Bleed the Dream’s tent – all before noon! My miserable position – it baffles you, no?

As I mentioned, all three contingents of my friends were stuck in traffic. Elena had my passes, Sarah and Angie were my company, and Jeffree was just good fun in general. All of them, not here. I was here, out in the sun (which wasn’t as scorching as the day before) and the heat (which was muted by the pleasant ocean breeze) and the dust (which was totally nonexistent) and the throngs of screaming kids (who weren’t screaming but instead chillaxing and holding up some good conversation to keep me entertained while introducing me to their friends so I met more people and on and on.)

I didn’t want to have fun. I didn’t want to make new friends. I wanted my friends and a cool, air conditioned area to relax in. But Warped Tour was able, once again, to disappoint my ability to be disappointed in the day. Right as I was getting really antsy, everyone arrived, took me to see Street Drum Corps and Bleed the Dream, then we headed backstage to the Bleed the Dream RV. Everyone was there and Whizzle had a barbecue alight. Even I could not find anything to complain about as plates and plates of hot dogs and turkey burgers and barbecue chicken and corn grilled to perfection were brought inside the RV. Keith (aka Keither Sutherland aka Keith Ledger) and I sat up front and talked before we were overrun by friends. Street Drum Corps (who had played a smoking set with the help of Shannon Leto of 30 Seconds to Mars) showed up with Tomo and Vickie. Emily ambled along to get her bag from my car then returned to hang out. Whizzle kept the food coming as more and more people showed up.

The best was Sarah Dope’s friend Zilch who was working for the freak show. We sat around talking about sideshows for quite some time before heading off to break down the freak show that is on the tour this year. I got to help out and in my zone of carrying gear and slitting zip cords and sweating so hard I thought I was going to pass out I realized that I had fun. Despite myself, despite bitching and moaning and screaming and being a pain in the ass the whole time, I had fun. I couldn’t help it. That’s why we do this every year. Because the sun and the heat and the dust all sucks but you can’t help but enjoy yourself on Warped Tour – even when you’re trying your best to be miserable. It’s a family. It’s just a good time. I realized it just in time to enjoy the last few hours of Warped Tour without trying to stop myself from having a good time and admitting it. I got to kiss all of my friends goodbye and leave far too soon.

So go to the tour. Yes, its hot and there are a lot of people. But you will have fun. Its not about the bands that are playing – it about the environment and how unique and welcoming it is. Bands don’t go sit out in their merch booths on other tours, The people who work other tours aren’t friendly and silly. Warped is a special tour with a special place in my heart – even when I try to harden my heart against it. That’s why I do it every summer – because at the end of the day, you’re dirty and sunburned but you’ve had the best time of your life.

It also must be noted that I got to see Steve and Karen and stopped being a pretentious sulky prat long enough to give hugs to my two favorite buzznet staffers. Go tell them hi and thank them for the tireless work they do for all of us here on Buzznet. Thanks, you guys!